{"id":547,"date":"2026-05-27T23:08:31","date_gmt":"2026-05-27T20:08:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alibilalbayrak.com\/?p=547"},"modified":"2026-05-27T23:08:33","modified_gmt":"2026-05-27T20:08:33","slug":"547","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alibilalbayrak.com\/index.php\/2026\/05\/27\/547\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\n

17 May\u0131s Pazar, Ankara Gar<\/h2>\n\n

Per\u015fembe mesai bitimiyle ba\u015flayan ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f plan\u0131m, \u00fc\u00e7 g\u00fcn\u00fcn ard\u0131ndan d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f treninde sona ermek \u00fczere. Birka\u00e7 saat sonra \u0130stanbul\u2019da olaca\u011f\u0131m. Yar\u0131m kalan her \u015fey b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m yerde, beni bekliyor: Okunacak kitaplar, g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fclecek arkada\u015flar, yap\u0131lan planlar ve konu\u015fulacak konular. Yani, iyi olan ne varsa ve geri kalan t\u00fcm angarya i\u015fler… Ne zaman “ev” dedi\u011fim o k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck kareden uzakla\u015fsam, kendimi Asya’ya giden Marco kadar \u00f6zg\u00fcr ve macera dolu hissediyorum.<\/p>\n\n

Cuma g\u00fcn\u00fc beklenmedik bir i\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fmesi ger\u00e7ekle\u015ftirdim ve eski dostlar\u0131 g\u00f6rme imk\u00e2n\u0131 buldum. Cumartesi ise ecnebilerin “Pub crawl”<\/em> dedi\u011fi \u015feyden biraz. Ben buna g\u00f6t\u00fcnde kurt varm\u0131\u015f gibi gezmek derdim. Her mekanda zaman\u0131 en verimli \u015fekilde ge\u00e7irmeye \u00f6zen g\u00f6sterip, y\u0131llard\u0131r \u00fczerinde itinayla \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m “bir gecede ka\u00e7 tane bira i\u00e7ebilirim” konusunun saha ara\u015ft\u0131rmalar\u0131n\u0131 yapt\u0131k ayn\u0131 zamanda. Akademik bir titizlikle \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 s\u00f6yleyebilirim. Her Ankara seferinde Aspava t\u00fcketmekten yorulan b\u00fcnyeme, bu yeni deneyim adeta ye\u015fil \u00e7ay detoksu gibi geldi.<\/p>\n\n

Pazar g\u00fcn\u00fc ise yeti\u015fmem gereken bir yer oldu\u011funu bilmenin o sinsi gerginli\u011fine ra\u011fmen; kahvalt\u0131, \u00f6\u011fle yeme\u011fi, kahve ve bira rit\u00fcelimi aksatmadan trende ba\u015flay\u0131p trende bitecek bu ser\u00fcvenin son k\u0131sm\u0131na ilerledim.<\/p>\n\n

Trene bindi\u011fimde, servis vagonu g\u00f6z\u00fcme bir farkl\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcnd\u00fc; sanki bir tiyatro sahnesi gibiydi. Bo\u015f koltuklara zihnimde yerle\u015ftirebilece\u011fim onlarca insan, haklar\u0131nda yazabilece\u011fim y\u00fczlerce senaryo vard\u0131. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fck\u00e7e zihnim biraz daha a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131, sesler canland\u0131; vagonun ortas\u0131nda ya\u015fayan yalandan koca bir d\u00fcnya kurdum. O bo\u015f koltuklarda oturanlar belki Londra\u2019dan \u015fatolar\u0131na d\u00f6nen lordlar ve k\u00fcrklerine sar\u0131nm\u0131\u015f han\u0131mlar\u0131 olabilirdi. Belki Rusya\u2019n\u0131n \u00e7orak k\u00f6ylerinden i\u015f bulmak umuduyla Petersburg\u2019a giden, ceplerinde bir \u015fi\u015fe patates votkas\u0131yla Das Kapital tart\u0131\u015fan k\u00f6yl\u00fclerdi. Belki de cumhuriyetin ilk y\u0131llar\u0131nda ya\u015fayan, \u00fccra bir okula atanan \u00f6\u011fretmen bey, surats\u0131z han\u0131m\u0131 ve iki \u00e7ocu\u011fu olabilirdi.<\/p>\n\n

Haz\u0131r tren yolculu\u011fu bulmu\u015fken ve zihnim b\u00f6yle har\u0131l har\u0131l \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken i\u00e7imden, \u201cTamam,\u201d dedim, tam s\u0131ras\u0131 ben \u201cBelki de yazar olabilirim.\u201d Acaba bir roman yazmaya m\u0131 ba\u015flasam? Stefan Zweig, eminim romanlar\u0131n\u0131 tam olarak b\u00f6yle trenlerde yaz\u0131yordu. Ger\u00e7i onun bindi\u011fi trenlerde muhtemelen fonda hafif bir klasik m\u00fczik \u00e7al\u0131yordu, benimkinde ise sadece k\u00f6t\u00fc bir u\u011fultu var ama olsun. O zamanlar da AirPods’lar yoktu.<\/p>\n\n

Ben d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrken\u2026 yava\u015f yava\u015f ger\u00e7ek yolcular gelmeye ba\u015flad\u0131 ve itiraf etmeliyim ki, ger\u00e7eklik benim hayal g\u00fcc\u00fcmden \u00e7ok daha renkliydi. \u00d6nce i\u015faret diliyle konu\u015fan d\u00f6rt g\u00fczel k\u0131z geldi ve o h\u0131zl\u0131 el haraketleri hemen dikkatimi \u00e7ekti. O kadar h\u0131zl\u0131 ve senkronize anla\u015f\u0131yorlard\u0131 ki, ne konu\u015ftuklar\u0131n\u0131 anlamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak bile t\u00fcm yol beni e\u011flendirebilirdi. Belli ki ayn\u0131 ama\u00e7la Ankara’ya gelmi\u015flerdi ve bir kursun ya da ayn\u0131 \u00f6zel okulun \u00f6\u011frencileriydiler.<\/p>\n\n

Ard\u0131ndan orta ya\u015fl\u0131, Adidas desenli e\u015fofmanlar\u0131 ve bitmek bilmeyen enerjileriyle bir grup han\u0131mefendi geldi. Beden e\u011fitimi \u00f6\u011fretmeni gibiydiler; hatta tav\u0131rlar\u0131na bak\u0131l\u0131rsa direkt milli tak\u0131m\u0131 \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131ran, g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc kupaya dikmi\u015f ko\u00e7lard\u0131. Atletik olan belki g\u00fcre\u015f\u00e7i bile olabilirdi. Biraz sonra uzun boylu, yap\u0131l\u0131 bir \u00e7ocuk, elinde \u015farj aletini bir kement gibi sallayarak ve etrafa av\u0131n\u0131 arayan bir aslan gibi bo\u015f bak\u0131\u015flar atarak vagona girdi. Muhtemelen yolculuk boyunca ufak bir “romantik komedi” ya\u015fay\u0131p zaman\u0131 de\u011ferlendirebilece\u011fi g\u00fczel bir han\u0131mefendi ar\u0131yordu. Ama kaderin cilvesine bak\u0131n ki, o beden e\u011fitimi hocas\u0131 gibi duran enerjik han\u0131mlar\u0131n aras\u0131na d\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc. Kayna\u015fmalar\u0131 o kadar h\u0131zl\u0131 oldu ki, eminim birazdan ko\u00e7 teyzeler ona saklama kab\u0131ndan b\u00f6rek veya k\u0131s\u0131r falan ikram etmeye ba\u015flayacaklard\u0131.<\/p>\n\n

\u0130ki kad\u0131n ve bir adam geldi sonra. 20’li ya\u015flar\u0131n sonlar\u0131nda olduklar\u0131ndan emindim. Birbirinden ho\u015flanan iki insan\u0131 her zaman ay\u0131rt edebilirdim. Kar\u015f\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131ya oturmu\u015f olsalar ve arkada\u015f\u00e7a sohbete ba\u015flam\u0131\u015f olasalar da beni kand\u0131ramazlard\u0131, birbirlerine a\u015f\u0131k olmal\u0131yd\u0131lar. Konu neden adam\u0131n son ili\u015fkisiydi bilmiyorum ama bundan bahsederken \u00e7ekingen anlat\u0131s\u0131 ve kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndakinin soluksuz dinleyi\u015fi benim \u015f\u00fcphelerimi hakl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kartacak cinstendi. Kulak misafirli\u011fi ay\u0131p olmas\u0131n diye daha fazlas\u0131na kulak kabartmad\u0131m.<\/p>\n\n

Sonras\u0131nda transit olarak ge\u00e7en birka\u00e7 ki\u015fi daha oldu. \u0130nsanlar\u0131n bu hallerine bakarken kendi kendime \u201cZweig’\u0131 falan bo\u015f ver,\u201d dedim. \u0130nsanlar\u0131 analiz edip ya\u015fant\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 tahmin etmek daha zevkli. Bu vagon tam Sigmund Freud’luktu! Onun da kitaplar\u0131nda pek \u00e7ok vakas\u0131 ve an\u0131s\u0131 b\u00f6yle trenlerde ge\u00e7miyor muydu? Hep yan\u0131na biri gelir veya o birini g\u00f6z\u00fcne kestirir; sonras\u0131nda o ki\u015fiyle konu\u015farak hayat\u0131ndaki t\u00fcm fiyaskolar\u0131n\u0131, ba\u015far\u0131s\u0131z fl\u00f6rtlerini, tak\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 ve \u00f6denemeyen faturalar\u0131n\u0131n su\u00e7unu annesine veya ilkokul arkada\u015flar\u0131na atard\u0131. Tam da bana uyacak hareketler, karakter asl\u0131nda! Hayat\u0131mdaki sorunlar\u0131n nedenini kontrol edemedi\u011fim zamanlara atmaktan daha rahatlat\u0131c\u0131 ne olabilir ki? \u015eimdi kalan \u00e7ay\u0131m\u0131 yudumlay\u0131p yolculara \u015f\u00f6yle dik dik bakmaya ba\u015flayabilirim.<\/p>\n\n

Ben tren yolculu\u011fum boyunca hangi rol\u00fc oynayaca\u011f\u0131ma karar vermeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken yolculu\u011fumun yar\u0131s\u0131 sona erdi.<\/p>\n\n

\n

“Her \u015fey eskisi gibi, yaln\u0131zca biz \u00f6yle de\u011filiz.”
\n \u2014 Stefan Zweig<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/blockquote>\n\n

\n Not: Bu s\u0131rada trene bindi\u011fimde ve servis vagonuna ge\u00e7meden \u00f6nce e\u015fyalar\u0131m\u0131 yerle\u015ftirirken, benim yerime oturdu\u011fu i\u00e7in kald\u0131rmak zorunda kald\u0131\u011f\u0131m kad\u0131n i\u00e7eri geldi. Kin g\u00fctmeden kafa selam\u0131yla kar\u015f\u0131layarak kar\u015f\u0131ma davet ettim. Hikayesini dinlerken \u0130stanbul’a kadar geldik. Hatta anons yapmadan Pendik’te trenin kap\u0131lar\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131nca a\u015fa\u011f\u0131ya inebilmek i\u00e7in k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck de bir kaos yaratt\u0131k.<\/em><\/small>\n <\/p>\n<\/article>\n\n\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

17 May\u0131s Pazar, Ankara Gar Per\u015fembe mesai bitimiyle ba\u015flayan ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f plan\u0131m, \u00fc\u00e7 g\u00fcn\u00fcn ard\u0131ndan d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f treninde sona ermek \u00fczere. Birka\u00e7 saat sonra \u0130stanbul\u2019da olaca\u011f\u0131m. Yar\u0131m kalan her \u015fey b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m yerde, beni bekliyor: Okunacak kitaplar, g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fclecek arkada\u015flar, yap\u0131lan planlar ve konu\u015fulacak konular. Yani, iyi olan ne varsa ve geri kalan t\u00fcm angarya i\u015fler… Ne zaman “ev” […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-547","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-yazilar"],"yoast_head":"\n- Ali Bilal Bayrak<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/alibilalbayrak.com\/index.php\/2026\/05\/27\/547\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"tr_TR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"- Ali Bilal Bayrak\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"17 May\u0131s Pazar, Ankara Gar Per\u015fembe mesai bitimiyle ba\u015flayan ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f plan\u0131m, \u00fc\u00e7 g\u00fcn\u00fcn ard\u0131ndan d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f treninde sona ermek \u00fczere. Birka\u00e7 saat sonra \u0130stanbul\u2019da olaca\u011f\u0131m. Yar\u0131m kalan her \u015fey b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131m yerde, beni bekliyor: Okunacak kitaplar, g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fclecek arkada\u015flar, yap\u0131lan planlar ve konu\u015fulacak konular. 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